Those 5 Dreaded Words: "You're Going To Miss This!"

Those 5 Dreaded Words: "You're Going To Miss This!"

“You’re going to miss this!” is probably not the encouragement you were hoping for while trying to survive a difficult parenting moment with a shred of dignity and grace. 

Those five dreaded words, ‘You’re going to miss this’. 

While this phrase may be accurate, these five words can leave a parent feeling guilty for not enjoying every single moment of parenting. (Newsflash, we were not created to enjoy every single moment of parenting!)

Parenthood is made up of many different phases — I like to call them seasons. While every season will stretch your limits and expand your heart, they will also challenge you in unique ways. There will be seasons that will pass by quickly, while others will have you questioning if you’ll be stuck there forever!

You cannot control how quickly you will move through a season, but you can control how you perceive each season. Rather than looking back with rose-colored glasses, you could choose to see the good while living in the moment. 

You might be asking yourself HOW? How do I uncover the good while amid such a tiring and stressful season of parenting? 

It’s not about sugar-coating or turning a blind eye to the hard moments. But what if you could soften the edges a bit to keep your eyes fixed on what is truly important? All those moments you’ll want to remember and celebrate - the bonding, the smiles, the accomplishments and growth - your child’s and your own!

It is possible for two things to be true: Parenting is hard AND parenting has many joyful moments. 

How can you weather through the hard seasons that are constantly changing while being able to enjoy the small moments? As you go through your days, rather than thinking of those five dreaded words, maybe you could consider these five helpful tips!

1.  Find the truths. It may feel easier to spot what is hard right now, but where are the other truths? What is also happening?

• “This is a tough season AND there are moments of joy here.”  
• “Understanding a new developmental stage is tough AND I’m a good parent.”​

2.  Find the opportunity rather than the responsibility. Reframing your ‘chores’ into an opportunity can help shift your mindset.

•  “I don’t have to have to ____, I get to ____.”

3.  Reframe & shift your perspective. Remind yourself this is a season and it will pass. 

• “We aren’t in a routine YET”
• “For now, drop-off at school is hard, and we’re working on it.”
• “This is not an emergency. I can let this go for now.

4.  Reflect and find the good in your situation. Ask yourself:

• What worked well today?
• How did I parent well today?
• What made my child smile or laugh today?
• What strengths are working for me right now?

​5.  Allow yourself some grace. Things will never be *perfect*  Let go of perfection and live in the abundance of *enough*

• Stick to your priorities and let the rest go - cut yourself some slack.
• What do YOU need to make your day go smoothly? 
• What resources can you rely on? 

These five tips will help you shift your mindset and find the good in the tough moments. Being more aware of those sweet moments will help you fill your ‘gratitude bank’ and help ease the stressors of difficult seasons. 

And, while we’re on the topic of shifting mindsets and finding the good on our parenting journeys, I have five other words to offer you. Rather than, “You’re going to miss this,” let’s start saying, “You’re doing a great job!” and “You will get through this!” Because BOTH things are true!

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