What's your Super Power?

What's You Super Power?

I’m a big believer in ‘finding the good’ in a situation but have really been lacking in finding the good in myself lately.  It’s all about that measuring stick — always measuring up to some imaginary mark.  And, while I usually don’t play that game, (or shall I say, I’ve been getting much better at not playing that game), I feel like I keep getting sucked in.  

What am I getting sucked into, you ask? Measuring up against myself!  As I reflect on the last 14+ months, I’m feeling overwhelmed with all the “should haves/could haves.”  I’m concerned I haven’t made the most of our time during the ‘stay at home’ period, and I’m feeling guilty about all the ‘stuff’ I haven’t tackled.  My brain tells me I did my best (as we all did) given the circumstances. But in my heart, I can’t help to feel as if I’ve failed. 

While my family was fortunate and didn’t experience any hardships during the shutdown (for which I am completely grateful), we certainly didn’t make the most of the time home.  While some families took advantage of the remote learning and traveled creating pandemic memories, we were more conservative and stayed home. We didn’t get a COVID dog or add on to our family. My basement was not reorganized, I didn’t clear out any closets or sort through the drawers.  Nor did I experiment with any recipes in the kitchen. And, although we were together pretty much 24/7, it felt like we had less quality time as a family than ever before. 

Then, I read this New York Times piece, “12 Moms and Their Secret Strengths,”  and it was just EVERYTHING to me.  It’s a collection of essays that allows us to drop the “I didn’t” or the “I’m not good at” statements.  Instead, it encourages us to find the qualities that identify us as great parents.  We each bring something special and unique to our own families...let’s celebrate that!

It was a reminder to adjust my perspective and start focusing on the positives.  Rather than perseverating on how I haven’t measured up, I began to hone in on all that I HAVE accomplished and found an appreciation for the mother that I am to my children. 

When I pause and let my inner judge rest, I can start to peel back the layers and really see below the surface. When I allow myself some grace and reframe my feelings around our time spent during the pandemic, I can see where my superpowers kicked in, allowing me to remember that I am exactly what my family needs. 

Wondering about my Superpowers?  Here are a few I’ve discovered- 

Chaos Coordinator- 

• I was able to keep everyone safe and relatively happy through the chaos and uncertainty in the COVID world. 
• I remembered the importance of self-care which helped me stay focused and calm throughout said chaos.
• I was intentional with my family’s time, carefully managing the delicate balance of family time, alone time, work time, remote learning time, outside time, and all the ‘times’ we needed to get in each day!

Connection Builder- 

• Tapped into my “I hear you” practice x100 to really allow my kids space to feel heard and understood while they tried to make sense of everything that wasn’t making too much sense to any of us!
• Found some time each day to do a fun activity with the family - even if it was for a small time just to stay connected.  Walks, movie night, fishing, sunset chasing…

The ‘Let’s Do It’ Mom (aka ‘Embarrassing Mom)- 

• I have the ability to keep things light and fun by being unpredictable and silly. And, although my kids think I’m weird, they secretly LOVE it!
• I’m always at the ready to drop sick dance moves and song parodies.
• I’m game for any race or challenge against my kids (who’s competitive??) Having said that, I AM painfully aware of how easy it is to get hurt at my age, so I’ve been somewhat selective with my choices.
• I can magically initiate carpool karaoke by cranking up the radio!

My accomplishments over the past year may not seem like much on paper, but in reality, they have certainly made an impact.  I’ve come to the realization, there will always be closets to organize and projects to tackle.  I’ve decided to let go of the feelings of failure and revel in my pandemic successes as simple as they may seem.  And, I’ll just keep all the closet doors closed for now!

We’re all rockstar parents in our own way.  Where do YOU shine?  What qualities make you a unique parent your family needs and adores?

I challenge YOU to find 10 ways you bring your unique self and specialness to your parenting game.  Heads up: It’s a tough start, but once you get going you may not be able to stop!  Go ahead, grab a piece of paper, start a google doc, open the notes app on your phone, and start your list!  Refer to it often to remember the awesomeness you bring to your family on the daily!

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